...WE ARE PARENTS!!! 5 years of waiting and hoping and disappointment and questioning and doubting are OVER. I will be honest - I'm not sure I feel any different (other than really tired!). I guess I was expecting some big overwhelming feeling the minute we became parents, but it didn't happen. It's like we transitioned from one journey to the next without a big cataclysmic bang we were expecting. I'm not sure if this is because we had to wait 2 days to officially become Jonah's parents or if this is how biological parents feel too. Part of it is we just signed a paper and became parents. That just doesn't seem right. We are still feeling a wide range of emotions, some we have never experienced before. But it's hard to put these in words. Explaining how we are feeling is like trying to explain time or faith or God. We decided it was kind of like all the big birthdays you build up for - when you turn 13 or 16 or 21 you don't actually feel any different, but you are a teenager, you get your driver's license and you can drink. It was just weird not being parents one minute, then the next minute we were!
People we have met during this adoption process have said once your child is in your arms, everything you went through to get to that point disappears. I would have to say that I agree with this. I'm not sure where the last 5 years went, but it doesn't really matter anymore. All that matters is that, while it is terrifying, we are now blessed with the responsibility of being Jonah's parents. I will be honest and say that sometimes it feels like we are still babysitting someone else's child, but day by day, the realization is setting in that he is ours forever, and that is an amazing feeling!
Oh, how I understand your words in this post! Sometimes I still pinch myself that God [somehow] deemed us worthy for the amazing experience of being CHOSEN as our girls' mom and dad. No greater feeling. He certainly had something amazing planned for your family, too, and we've LOVED getting a front row seat to watch it unfold!
ReplyDeleteThis gave me goosebumps! Congrats and blessings to your family of 3!
ReplyDeleteI'm so happy for the three of you!
ReplyDeleteIn the first few weeks after having Mary, if she was in her room peacefully taking a nap, I totally felt absolutely no different than before. You're totally right, "and just like that, " you're a parent!
Jonah is blessed beyond measure to have the two of you for parents!!!!
Congratulations! I can so relate with you feelings! I remember putting our son in his carseat and looking at our social worker and saying "so we just get to take him?" Haha it felt so weird to walk into the building with an empty carseat and walk out with our son in it!
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